The inventor of the comma. Jealously guarded his invention. This
threatened to squelch creativity in the early days, so Gutenberg had
him assassinated.

The inventor of zero. Abdul al-Hassan al-Zeroth. The ancient
mathemagician. The caliphs of Baghdad feared his occult powers. They
started a disinformation campaign against zero, characterizing it as a
representation of reality of the type forbidden by Muslim law. He was
pelted to death by a mob throwing perfectly round stones.

The inventor of the speed of light. I'd love to find him and pay him
homage, but he can never be directly experienced.

The inventor of laughter. Aziz al-Haha. Old women threw the sign of the
evil eye when they heard his braying. The donkeys smiled with
recognition. Young swells fingered their daggers menacingly, then
chased him through the alleys of the city. Then Aziz slipped on a
banana peel, and the rest, as they say, is history. As they say.