I'll be the prophet of babies & doggies, and the assistant of the unknown
moment -- the invisible benefactor. Minister to the senile & insane.
Consoler of the failure and medic to the suicide. Leader of the newly dead
and comforter of the iron maiden.

I won't tell the failures to get their act together and that they can make it
if they try. That message is over and done with. I will tell the failures that
they can, and should, drink. This is how you treat the world. The world is
a sickness, and that's how you medicate that sickness. Drink! Smoke! Shoot!

I will perform the exact function of the universe himself, which is: give you
more of what you want. You want death? I am become death, destroyer of worlds.
You want life? I want more life, fucker! I have all the life you need, and then some.
You want candy? Open up, sunshine! You want tears? Let me attach these
suckers to your eyes -- might as well do all your crying at one time, eh?
When I'm done with you, your tear glands will be dry as lentils. There are
certain giants who eat only soup made of used-up tear glands. Shall I disappoint
them? You don't want me to disappoint them.